Beaver, Schmeaver

Gab: It's an animal with a long tail and builds dams.

Argie: A beaver!

Gab: When you don't bring it with you, you...

Argie: Leave it! Leave the beaver!

Gab: No!

Argie: Leave the beaver at home?

Gab: Add a preposition!

Argie: Live on the beaver?

Gab: That is so wrong! Do you know what a beaver is?

Kodi: What are you, crab lice?

The word to guess is "Leave It To Beaver".

Gender Preferences

We were playing Taboo.

Katuray said, "It's the male version of Olive." (This, of course, already violated the game's rules.)

"Popeye!" yelled everyone.

The word to guess was "Oliver Stone."

To Moe, My Early Christmas Present

I never knew that being naughty

can be oh, so nice.

I love you very, very much.

Stocking Stuffers and Christmas Karma

These are way better than duplexes and cheques.


1. Ditto.

2. Good morning, Kodi! I love you.

3. Good night, Kodi! I love you.

4. (I know you're probably tired of hearing this, but I love you.) I'm afraid that growing tired of hearing that is far from possible.

5. Just hold on tight.

6. I'm beginning to love this bench.

7. I probably shouldn't tell you but I dreamed of you last night. It's like a silent movie with words coming out of your smile.

8. I Won't Spend Another Night Alone by the Ataris

9. You always say how evil you are (or could be). How about saying how good you could be?

10. Well, I'm a good son and brother, I'm on my way to becoming a good boyfriend, and I'm looking forward to becoming a renewed man. I'm hardworking and focused and good at playing the guitar... plus I can vanish pimples in photos.

11. Do you remember when we kissed? After I left, I walked to the direction you pointed. I changed my mind and turned. I walked back, hoping to get a glance of you for one last time.

12. I guess I'll be seeing you in everywhere, even in the most unlikely places.

13. The 10-day means two days less with the keeper of the warped, evil mind.

14. I love my dreams. It's there that I get closest to you.

15. I can hardly believe this. Let's put it this way - heaven and earth met. They touched through faith.

16. Thank you for making me feel that I'm not alone. Everyday when I wake up and when I go to bed, I know that you're with me.

17. I only love people in maroon tops.

17. (Let's play. Do you love me, Moe?) Yes. Where are the chairs?

18. (I like playing this game with just you because I get to sit on your lap when I run out of seats.) It's better without seats. Do you love me?

19. I hope there's fresh air in Jupiter.

20. I just saw a shooting star. I'll make a wish. I just saw another one. Do you want to make one for me?

21. Just knowing that you're thinking of me completes my day, Kodi. What more if you send me kisses?

22. Yes, we are together.

23. Are we there yet?

24. I am so lucky.

25. You are so sweet.

26. I don't want to disappoint you.

26. Three weeks ago, I couldn't see myself in a relationship. But now, I find myself in love with you.

27. I spent a night in a police precinct back in high school.

28. I wished for a better life and it has begun.

29. I still can't believe that I have you. (You'd better believe it. It's already the morning after and I'm still standing in front of you.)

30. I miss you.

31. I lost count of your kisses.

Dear Me

For my birthday, I decided to write a letter to myself ten years ago.

Dear 16-year old Kodaly,

It feels so great to be young, doesn't it? To have all the world to twirl around your little finger. This is one of the best times of your entire life. You have the attic of a townhouse all to yourself, you're in a soccer team, and you finally realized that Geology is actually an interesting course. You can do as you please, considering that you can hoodwink your parents out of their hard-earned money.

I know that no matter what your 26-year old self will say, you will still do what you want anyway. But if you slowed down your life's pace and be a little less headstrong, maybe you can save both of us a lot of heartache.

One of the things that I want to tell you is that you must never fall in love with your roomie. Do not help him stick glow-in-the-dark stickers on his room's ceiling. Do not ask him any questions regarding chemistry. Do not study with him or even think of applying face masques with him. Do not play with hair mascara with him. Never go to his room wearing only a tank top and panties when you have nightmares. Do not cook for him because he will just stay in his room and not eat that dinner that you prepared for him. Do not buy him chocolate bars. He is just going to break your heart and leave you pining for him years later.

If there is someone you can be with, it's Erwin. He might not be that great to look at and he will gain a lot of weight after a few years, but he is the kind of guy who will love you forever, if you give him the chance. His family loves you and given the kind of guy he is, he will surely take care of you. I know that his being perpetually late is getting on your nerves, but in the larger scheme of things, this is very trivial. If you do not hold on to him, he will be Arlene's.

Stay away from all those frat boys. They just want to get in your pants. Or under your skirt (because you hardly wear pants). But even until this day, I still believe what you said. That good girls go to heaven and bad girls go everywhere.

When your mother calls you and tells you that your grandfather is in the hospital because of emphysema, go home to Polomolok immediately. He's dying. You do not want your last memory of someone that you loved with all your heart to just be a telephone conversation wherein he said, "Good girl ka Kods, ha. Mahal ka ni Lolo."

Make sure you don't play hookey and that you read your textbooks.

Please make sure that you eat. Being as skinny as Kate Moss isn't really that appealing. I have gained a few pounds but I am very, very beautiful. Men will still fall in love with you not just because you have the best abs in the campus. All you need to learn is a little compassion and to give more of yourself.

I know that right now, it feels as though this will never end. But soon, the world will stop waiting for you. A few years from now, you will learn how to do the laundry and hold a beautiful baby boy in your arms.

The reason why I wanted to write to you is not because I have regrets. In fact, you will never have any real ones. The truth is, I still want you to live your life the way you do. If we decided otherwise, I would not be the person I am right now - scarred, broken, even, yet resilient. I wrote to you because I want to tell you that no matter what you will go through, you will grow yet remain the same. I want to tell you that in the most difficult parts of the next ten years, when things are pulsing, hurting, and throbbing, remember that everything will pass. All you have to do is to remain strong. I know that I can count on you for that, you funny, silly girl.

Love,

26-year old Kodaly

I Love You, Emo Boy

Burstday

Yes, my birthday has come and gone. I spent my day at work. In fact, it was my class' graduation day.


Here are some facts and figures.


Number of special things planned: 0

Number of special things that happened: 21 (trainees)

Number of cups of hazelnut hot chocolate: 1

Number of gingerbread boys eaten: 1

Number of carnations received: 2 dozens

Number of bars of chocolate received: 1 dark mint chocolate (yum!)

Number of candles on my cake: 3 (Is that figure supposed to be multiplied by ten? I'm far from thirty!)

Number of hours at work: 12

Number of people I terminated: 4

Number of train rides: 1

Number of people in the train car: countless

Number of millimeters from an emo boy while inside the train: 0

Number of stops: 4 (not enough)

Number of alcohol units consumed: 6 vodka tonics, 2 tequilla sunrises, 3 margaritas

Number of kisses: 7

The Heat is On In Saigon

Carl has a new name for me. It's Miss Saigon.

It started out when I did not have any training schedule and I was bored to tears so I observed him run his class for a couple of hours. He had a class full of rowdy boys who love rock and roll.

Even their group names were names of '90's bands. They get a kick out of yelling "Rock on!" when someone says a grammatically incorrect sentence.

After observing Carl, I would meet them in along the hallways and they were always enthusiastic about seeing me.

One of Carl's trainees is a true blue American and during their graduation day, I mind fucked him. He lost seven rounds of verbal war and apparently, it turned him on. He said that no one in Manila has ever left him speechless and he was asking Carl for my contact number so that he can ask me out on a date.

Carl, thankfully, is a good friend of mine. He did not give out my number because he said that that guy was married and is just such a horn dog. (I love you, Carl.)

He isn't hot at all and one word I used to describe him, to Carl's amusement, is "scraggly".

He was ribbing me about it with some other trainers and he said that the guy was flirting with another girl in his training room. But now I am his new Miss Saigon.

"Kodi can now be classified as exotique," Carl remarked.

Mike said, "Well, then, Kodi, you can also be his helicopter."

Yep. I'll be taking off in a bit.

Do You Know What I Feel Like Doing?

I feel like kicking off my shoes and going dancing in the moonlight.